A BEAUTIFUL REMEMBRANCE 100 YEARS LATER–by Cheryl Pierson

Have you ever noticed how obituaries of yesteryear seem to always “say more” than many of the current ones do? (I don’t know—maybe it’s just me—I’m an obituary reader! Even those of people I don’t know.) I think one reason for this is, of course, now, everything is shortened and abbreviated to the point that sometimes the heartfelt meaning is lost. We have to make it “fit on the page” and not “run too long” in the fast pace of our modern world.

In 1921, William Allen White was the owner of the Emporia Gazette. So when his teenage daughter, Mary, died suddenly, he penned one of the best obituaries that probably ever has been written. Reading this final summation of her young life, I felt like I knew Mary without, of course, having ever met her. Her obituary became famous throughout the United States at the time it was published, 100 years ago this month.

In my upcoming novel, LANDON, a young woman about the same age as Mary dies. She happens to be a central player in the story, even though she dies before the story ever begins. Though there was no obituary written for Little Dove in my story–she was half Indian, the wife of a gambler–I wanted to show how loved she was by the other characters in the story who are left behind. In a twist of fate, she is the reason that Landon and Alissa fall in love–she’s Landon’s younger sister, and also the mother of Alissa’s young half-brother, Zach. Landon had planned to take the boy from Alissa however he could, but he never planned on falling in love with her. Alissa had no idea that Landon and Little Dove were connected in any way until much later, after she was as in love with him as he with her.

AMAZON PRE-ORDER LINK FOR LANDON: https://tinyurl.com/ap9f493n

This obituary written for Mary White is so precious and lovely, I found myself wishing that Little Dove had had some kind of remembrance like this as well, but I think for her, it would be enough to know how much her brother and her friend loved her, and kept her memory alive for her young son.

Mary’s obituary is long, compared to those of today. I hope you’ll read it all the way through and share this father’s love and truly,  the entire community’s love, for this young woman. She must have been such a  shining star, even at her young age.

 

Mary White obituary

by William Allen White

Emporia Gazette, May 17, 1921

 

The Associated Press reports carrying the news of Mary White’s death declared that it came as the result of a fall from a horse. How she would have hooted at that! She never fell from a horse in her life. Horses have fallen on her and with her—”I’m always trying to hold ’em in my lap,” she used to say. But she was proud of few things, and one of them was that she could ride anything that had four legs and hair. Her death resulted not from a fall but from a blow on the head which fractured her skull, and the blow came from the limb of an overhanging tree on the parking.

 

The last hour of her life was typical of its happiness. She came home from a day’s work at school, topped off by a hard grind with the copy on the High School Annual, and felt that a ride would refresh her. She climbed into her khakis, chattering to her mother about the work she was doing, and hurried to get her horse and be out on the dirt roads for the country air and the radiant green fields of spring. As she rode through the town on an easy gallop, she kept waving at passers-by. She knew everyone in town. For a decade the little figure in the long pigtail and the red hair ribbon has been familiar on the streets of Emporia, and she got in the way of speaking to those who nodded at her. She passed the Kerrs, walking the horse in front of the Normal Library, and waved at them; passed another friend a few hundred feet farther on, and waved at her.

 

The horse was walking, and as she turned into North Merchant Street she took off her cowboy hat, and the horse swung into a lope. She passed the Tripletts and waved her cowboy hat at them, still moving gayly north on Merchant Street. A Gazette carrier passed—a High School boy friend—and she waved at him, but with her bridle hand; the horse veered quickly, plunged into the parking where the low-hanging limb faced her and, while she still looked back waving, the blow came. But she did not fall from the horse; she slipped off, dazed a bit, staggered, and fell in a faint. She never quite recovered consciousness.

 

But she did not fall from the horse, neither was she riding fast. A year or so ago she used to go like the wind. But that habit was broken, and she used the horse to get into the open, to get fresh, hard exercise, and to work off a certain surplus energy that welled up in her and needed a physical outlet. The need has been in her heart for years. It was back of the impulse that kept the dauntless little brown-clad figure on the streets and country roads of the community and built into a strong, muscular body what had been a frail and sickly frame during the first years of her life. But the riding gave her more than a body. It released a gay and hardy soul. She was the happiest thing in the world. And she was happy because she was enlarging her horizon. She came to know all sorts and conditions of men; Charley O’Brien, the traffic cop, was one of her best friends. W. L. Holtz, the Latin teacher, was another. Tom O’Connor, farmer-politician, and the Rev. J. H. Rice, preacher and police judge, and Frank Beach, music master, were her special friends; and all the girls, black and white, above the track and below the track, in Pepville and Stringtown, were among her acquaintances. And she brought home riotous stories of her adventures. She loved to rollick; persiflage was her natural expression at home. Her humor was a continual bubble of joy. She seemed to think in hyperbole and metaphor. She was mischievous without malice, as full of faults as an old shoe. No angel was Mary White, but an easy girl to live with for she never nursed a grouch five minutes in her life.

 

With all her eagerness for the out-of-doors, she loved books. On her table when she left her room were a book by Conrad, one by Galsworthy, “Creative Chemistry” by E. E. Slosson, and a Kipling book. She read Mark Twain, Dickens, and Kipling before she was ten—all of their writings. Wells and Arnold Bennett particularly amused and diverted her. She was entered as a student in Wellesley for 1922; was assistant editor of the High School Annual this year, and in line for election to the editorship next year. She was a member of the executive committee of the High School Y.W.C.A.

 

Within the last two years she had begun to be moved by an ambition to draw. She began as most children do by scribbling in her school books, funny pictures. She bought cartoon magazines and took a course—rather casually, naturally, for she was, after all, a child with no strong purposes—and this year she tasted the first fruits of success by having her pictures accepted by the High School Annual. But the thrill of delight she got when Mr. Ecord, of the Normal Annual, asked her to do the cartooning for that book this spring, was too beautiful for words. She fell to her work with all her enthusiastic heart. Her drawings were accepted, and her pride–always repressed by a lively sense of the ridiculous figure she was cutting–was a really gorgeous thing to see. No successful artist every drank a deeper draft of satisfaction than she took from the little fame her work was getting among her schoolfellows. In her glory, she almost forgot her horse—but never her car.

 

For she used the car as a jitney bus. It was her social life. She never had a “party” in all her nearly seventeen years—wouldn’t have one; but she never drove a block in her life that she didn’t begin to fill the car with pick-ups! Everybody rode with Mary White—white and black, old and young, rich and poor, men and women. She like nothing better than to fill the car with long- legged High School boys and an occasional girl, and parade the town. She never had a “date,” nor went to a dance, except once with her brother Bill, and the “boy proposition” didn’t interest her—yet. But young people—great spring-breaking, varnish-cracking, fender-bending, door-sagging carloads of “kids”—gave her great pleasure. Her zests were keen. But the most fun she ever had in her life was acting as chairman of the committee that got up the big turkey dinner for the poor folks at the county home; scores of pies, gallons of slaw, jam, cakes, preserves, oranges, and a wilderness of turkey were loaded into the car and taken to the county home. And, being of a practical turn of mind, she risked her own Christmas dinner to see that the poor folks actually got it all. Not that she was a cynic; she just disliked to tempt folks. While there, she found a blind colored uncle, very old, who could do nothing but make rag rugs, and she rustled up from her school friends rags enough to keep him busy for a season. The last engagement she tried to make was to take the guests at the county home out for a car ride. And the last endeavor of her life was to try to get a rest room for colored girls in the High School. She found one girl reading in the toilet, because there was no better place for a colored girl to loaf, and it inflamed her sense of injustice and she became a nagging harpy to those who she thought could remedy the evil. The poor she always had with her and was glad of it. She hungered and thirsted for righteousness; and was the most impious creature in the world. She joined the church without consulting her parents, not particularly for her soul’s good. She never had a thrill of piety in her life, and would have hooted at a “testimony.” But even as a little child, she felt the church was an agency for helping people to more of life’s abundance, and she wanted to help. She never wanted help for herself. Clothes meant little to her. It was a fight to get a new rig on her; but eventually a harder fight to get it off. She never wore a jewel and had no ring but her High School class ring and never asked for anything but a wrist watch. She refused to have her hair up, though she was nearly seventeen. “Mother,” she protested,” you don’t know how much I get by with, in my braided pigtails, that I could not with my hair up.” Above every other passion of her life was her passion not to grow up, to be a child. The tomboy in her, which was big, seemed loath to be put away forever in skirts. She was a Peter Pan who refused to grow up.

 

Her funeral yesterday at the Congregational Church was as she would have wished it; no singing, no flowers except the big bunch of red roses from her brother Bill’s Harvard classmen—heavens, how proud that would have made her!—and the red roses from the Gazette forces, in vases, at her head and feet. A short prayer: Paul’s beautiful essay on “Love” from the Thirteenth Chapter of First Corinthians; some remarks about her democratic spirit by her friend, John H. J. Rice, pastor and police judge, which she would have deprecated if she could; a prayer sent down for her by her friend Carl Nau; and, opening the service, the slow, poignant movement from Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata, which she loved; and closing the service a cutting from the joyously melancholy first movement of Tchaikovsky’s Pathetic Symphony, which she liked to hear, in certain moods, on the phonograph, then the Lord’s Prayer by her friends in High School.

That was all.

 

For her pallbearers only her friends were chosen: her Latin teacher, W. L. Holtz; her High School principal, Rice Brown; her doctor, Frank Foncannon; her friend, W. W. Finney; her pal at the Gazette office, Walter Hughes; and her brother Bill. It would have made her smile to know that her friend, Charley O’Brien, the traffic cop had been transferred from Sixth and Commercial to the corner near the church to direct her friends who came to bid her good-by.

 

A rift in the clouds in a gray day threw a shaft of sunlight upon her coffin as her nervous, energetic little body sank to its last sleep. But the soul of her, the glowing, gorgeous, fervent soul of her, surely was flaming in eager joy upon some other dawn.”

 

Mary’s father, journalist and newspaperman William Allen White, Feb. 10, 1868-Jan. 31, 1944

Don’t you feel like you know Mary through her father’s words? Have you ever read an obituary that touched you deeply? One that made you laugh? This one, especially that last lovely paragraph, brings tears every time I read it.

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A native Oklahoman, I've been influenced by the west all my life. I love to write short stories and novels in the historical western and western romance genres, as well as contemporary romantic suspense! Check my Amazon author page to see my work: http://www.amazon.com/author/cherylpierson
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32 thoughts on “A BEAUTIFUL REMEMBRANCE 100 YEARS LATER–by Cheryl Pierson”

    • Hi Rachel, I so respect this father for being able to pen such a lovely tribute–what grief he had to be feeling, and the idea that he could even sit down and write such a beautiful, coherent tribute to his daughter at such a time is beyond anything I can even imagine. I really admire him for that, because I think this is probably the most beautiful, loving tribute I have ever read.

  1. What a lovely obit.

    Modern obits are expensive, so most just opt for the funeral home website. We had a wonderful one written about my mother-in-law a year ago.

    • Hi Denise, I was raised in a small town in Oklahoma, and my sister spent all of her adult live in another very small town here–both of those towns had papers that published these along with birth announcements and wedding “write-ups” at no cost, if memory serves me. But now? Oh, my gosh! It costs a fortune–especially in the larger newspapers. And today, it’s not worth it, since newspapers are fading fast. The funeral home website is really more logical as the people who are truly interested will be the ones who will see it.

    • I felt the same way, Ann. I think it’s probably the sweetest, most descriptive, loving remembrance I have ever read. It really struck me how tough it had to be for this father to sit down and write something so eloquent at such a horrific time in his life. He really did his daughter justice in this.

  2. WOW! In such a short life she sure did live! Too bad people can’t afford to have an obituary put in the papers like that today. Although, many people would.t read the entire thing because they are too busy to be bothered with such. It’s sad……

    • Carrie, she really did have a good life in those few years! I wish I had known her. She had to have been someone who knew how to have fun and enjoy life from this description. I agree about the obituaries of today. They are terribly costly, and anymore, people don’t have the connection to their fellow man, or even their family, in some cases, that used to be so prevalent in years past.

    • I felt the same way, Quilt Lady! He sure packed a lot of information and memories and description into that obituary! Must have been so tough for him to write.

  3. What a beautiful tribute. I could ‘see’ Mary riding through town and waving at everyone. Thank you so much for sharing.

    • Yes, Barbara, I could too! Isn’t it strange how her father’s words created such a vivid picture of her–enough that just reading this a hundred years later, I feel like he let us peek in a window at her personality enough that we KNEW her. That is such a gift!

    • Hi Bridgette! Well, I sure hope everyone will love it as much as I do. I especially love the way Landon and Alissa meet and begin their relationship and what comes of such uncertain beginnings. I’m going to hate to see their story end. LOL

  4. Wow!! Today, here in my city, if an obituary is printed in the newspaper, it costs! They used to be printed for free, but back in 1997, they started charging for it. I can’t imagine how much this would cost today! I know that back when my sister married in 1978, one paper printed EVERYTHING about a wedding! The details of the dress, the ones in attendance, what there was to eat, how many bridesmaids, what they all wore in detail, the Maid or Matron of Honor and what she wore. Now, you don’t even get wedding announcements in the paper. Things have definitely changed!!

    • Trudy, both newspapers in the smaller towns I mentioned where I lived and where my sister settled did that same thing about the wedding descriptions, and the details about the material, even, that was used in the bridesmaids’ and bride’s gowns, and put pictures in–even when couples got engaged they’d print engagement pictures. In the place where my sister lived, they did a thing once or twice a week called “Today’s Dude” or “Today’s Dolly” and printed pictures of people’s kids that they’d sent in–like baby and toddler pictures taken at Olan Mills Studios, etc. (Now that’s a blast from the past!) LOL I don’t even know if you can PAY to have wedding announcements and descriptions of the “doings” in the paper these days. Yes, things have changed, for sure. I miss those old “society pages” of the paper!

  5. Hi, What a Beautiful Obituary and what a Beautiful Tribute to his daughter. Thank you so much for sharing it, it sure did touch my heart. Have a Great day and a great week.

  6. You’re right, Cheryl, I do know Mary now, and that was the most moving obituary I’ve ever read. But you’re also right that you’ll never see one like it again, not in today’s papers, what few are left, because it costs too much to write that many words now. It’s sad that we can’t express our most heartfelt feelings for our loved ones when they pass, just because of money. But that’s life, isn’t it? I can’t wait to read your book. I know it will do the series justice.

    • Charlene! So good to see you today! I’m so glad you stopped by. I’m so glad to hear you say you “know Mary” now, too. That’s exactly how I felt. No, we’ll never see the like of these heartfelt obituaries again, will we? Everything revolves around money in today’s world, and most people don’t slow down long enough to read the written word and ponder the meaning and the depth of feeling that went into writing something like this. I’m so excited about our series! I have not had a chance to read some of the ones I’ve bought already, but I’m sure hoping to just be able to carve out some time and sit down and treat myself! Thank you for your very kind words!

  7. This was beautiful. I also read obits and I once read a line in an obit that really stuck with me. “When she gave, she gave with both hands.” How I pray that something similar can be said about me.

    • Oh, Rhonda—that is so beautiful. What a unique way of putting it, and you’re right–so memorable. I agree with you–I pray that something like that could be said about me, too, at my funeral. I think most of us really do TRY to “give with both hands” but I know I do fall short many times. So glad you stopped by today.

    • LInda, you’re welcome. I am glad you stopped by and took a moment to read the post. I said before, I don’t know how he was able to dredge up the fortitude to sit down at such a time and write such beautiful thoughts about his beloved daughter. But he did a wonderful job.

  8. Thanks for sharing this, Cheryl. You’re right about how dry and unemotional most current obituaries are. Do we get charged by the word now? May we consult Mary White’s obituary next time there’s need of penning such for a relative and create one half as heartfelt and loving.

    • Mary, yes, here I think that is exactly how they charge, by the word! So, only the very well-to-do have nice write ups in the paper. I remember when I worked at the National Cowboy and Western Heritage Museum WAY back in the early 2000’s –one of the big donors to that museum passed away and they actually closed the museum and had his funeral IN THE MUSEUM. The obituary in the paper was huge, not only because he had a ton of money but because he had also founded the paper. I wish I had kept it now, because it was really a piece of history. I really do think that using this obituary for Mary would serve as a wonderful guide–mainly because I can’t even imagine putting two coherent thoughts together in such a terrible time of grief.

  9. Sobbing by the end; at the loss of such a wonderful spirit! Thanks so much for sharing this…

    • Elissa, yes, I was too! I have always thought about what kind of an adult woman she’d be and the kind of life she’d have–you can just bet it would have been one full of love and giving, with a little mischief mixed in!

  10. What a lovely summation of a short short life. It must have been a cathartic exercise for him to write this. It certainly shows her personality and the love he had for her. Thank you for sharing.
    One thing I have noticed since moving to the South is the difference in the obituaries from those in other places we have lived. Some are short, but there have been some that were over half the page of the newspaper. None were as lovely as the one here and most kept saying what a great person they were but never said anything they did that showed it.

    • Hi Patricia! I agree with you. So many DO talk about generalities like “they were active members of their church” or “she loved children” etc. But this one was so detailed! And just so beautiful. Yes, I’m sure it was cathartic for her father to write this, but gosh, I don’t know how he even managed to put two sane thoughts together that soon after her death. That had to be such a shock for him. Thanks for stopping by and I’m sorry I’m so late in answering!

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