Earlier this month I went away for a bit to write. Now, the place that I stayed at was in the middle of a cow pasture. Not kidding. You had to go through two gates and drive through the cow pasture – being careful not to hit any cows – to get there.
So, yeah, I felt right at home, but I’m also lazy. I did take some groceries with me, but I’m one of those shoppers who only gets what’s on the list. I do not deviate. I guess some people call it a disability, but I get easily overwhelmed when presented with too much “stuff” and shopping is just one of those areas where my brain overloads really fast. I can do it, I just need a list, and honestly I don’t notice anything beyond focusing on getting the next thing on my list and getting out of the store.
Well, I decided to be healthy (why? I can’t really answer that) and I got the ingredients to make pumpkin mushroom soup (thanks for the recipe, Patrice!), blueberries and sweet potatoes. I also got a bag of peas and some cheese and a few filets of fish.
That’s what I had on my list.
I forgot to put ice cream on my list.
So, I left the store, drove to the place where I was staying, got out of the car, opened the gate, got back in the car, drove through the gate, got out of the car, shut the gate, careful to jump over the six inch deep mud puddle that was right where the gate closed on the other side, walked back to the car and drove through the pasture to the next gate, got out of the car, opened the gate, got back in the car, drove through the gate, got out of the car, shut the gate, got back in the car and drove to the house. (Also, the lock on the house was a little tricky and I didn’t lock it while I was there, but I did lock it when I left and it usually took me about ten minutes to get it unlocked when I got back to the house.)
So, anyway, it was quite a procedure to get in.
It was the next day before I realized I didn’t have any ice cream.
So, like I said, I’m lazy and it was a LOT easier for me to walk around the house lamenting the fact that there was NO ICE CREAM IN THE HOUSE than it was to leave, spend ten minutes locking the door, driving to the gate, stopping and getting out of the car, etc etc.
So, I’m stuck at this house with all this health food I thought it would be a good idea and NO ICE CREAM.
So, yeah. I ended up losing eight pounds. I guess I got better gas mileage on the way home than I did on the way down, but it took me longer because I stopped at Taco Bell like five times.
Alright, so my weight loss tip is put a fence and two gates around your house and you’ll make junk food runs less often. : )
So, the day after I got home Watson asked me to go with him to get a load of silage for our cows. I thought that was sweet – he missed me! But after I said, “Sure, I’ll go,” he said, “Dress warm. The heater in that old truck doesn’t work.”
Ha.
He didn’t miss me. He just wanted me along in case he got stranded along the road he’d have someone to push him.
Anyway, I put a bunch of layers on and got in the old dump truck. It’s the truck I drove last spring when I was hauling rocks – the one that didn’t have any brakes. I think the copperheads were all hibernating.
Watson said we had to hurry because there were no lights in the truck. Like, no headlights. No tail lights. No brake lights. No turn signals. No lights. At all. Also, not only does it not have a heater, but part of the floor is missing to the point where you can see the road flying by beneath you. That didn’t concern me too much, neither did the rattles and shakes until Watson said, “Is your door shut?”
Well, I’m an old hand at this, so, as we’re driving down the highway (not too fast because it has a top speed of like 40 mph), I grab the handle, shove it open and slam it shut. It still kinda rattles, like it’s thinking about falling off, but wants to wait until we’re going around a turn until it does so.
I check – because you all are thinking it too – no seatbelts. This does not shock anyone, right?
So, we’re going on these backroads and it’s wide enough for two cows to pass side-by-side as long as one of them isn’t pregnant and we’re going down this steep hill into a gully and the road kind of turns in the middle of the hill and right on the turn we meet a school bus.
(There were maybe two houses along that whole ten mile road and we passed, like, three busses. Maybe there was a field trip back there somewhere. idk)
So, Watson has just told me how he bypassed the air dryer because it was keeping the truck from airing up, and he mentioned that the truck was too far gone for him to want to put any money into maintenance and I grab ahold of the door handle – because when it evacuates, I’m going with it – and just pray the end is painless, because I drove the truck and the brakes didn’t work.
Watson slams on the brakes – the truck actually slows down – and he moves the truck as far off the road as possible and I’m pretty sure I see my guardian angle picking the bus up and moving it overtop of us and once we’ve made it down to the bottom of the gully and start up the other side I say, “I guess you fixed the brakes.”
Watson looks at me like I’m the stupidest person in the world and he says, “Well, yeah. You can’t drive a truck on the road with no brakes.”
Humph. That’s not what he said last spring when I was driving the truck. But hey, whatever. By the time we got home, I was too cold to be upset about it. Plus, I think that was our Valentine’s Day date and I didn’t want to ruin it.
Okay, that was yesterday and I’m still wearing my beanie hat and five layers of clothes. I think I might have mentioned that the hot water in our shower wasn’t working and I was terrified of taking all my clothes off and getting in the shower only to find that it STILL wasn’t working. I’m a big believer in better safe than sorry.
Thanks so much for spending time with me today!
Wow! What a time you’ve had. Hope you got some writing done.
Haha! Yeah, I always have fun. But, I did write as well. Three and a half books. I think I could have gotten that fourth book finished if I’d have had ice cream. : )
Wow, sounds amazing. Thanks for the wonderful post.
It was fun! Thanks for stopping by today!
Love those writing retreats. I’ll think harder about the food next time I go!
Haha! I can shop for you. : ) Seriously, I know I can do more work if I eat well. It really does make a difference for me.
Eight pounds, Jessie?? Whoa! I hope it was all the calories your brain burned up writing pages and pages! Ha!
Hoping you’re warm again by now!
Yes! It was probably mostly water weight, but I did go to bed hungry a bunch – no family to nag me into cooking supper when I was exhausted, so…I didn’t. ; )
Oh, Jessie, that was so amusing! Sounds like me and my hubby in our old dump truck back in the day….Ahhh and ice cream is one of my addictions. Yum!
Ah! You have those memories, too? Fun times, right? (Especially after they’re over. It truly WAS cold. I couldn’t feel my feet when I got out of the truck. lol)
This sounds like the kind of day I would have. A while back we were without hot water for several days because we had a gas leak and I am not a fan of cold showers myself but you do what you have to do.
That’s true. You do what you have to! (But I prefer hot showers!) I’m glad you have your hot water back!
Sounds fabulous! Jessie, Thank you for sharing.
It was fun! Thanks for stopping by! : )
Oh my goodness, what a time you’ve had. I would be going nuts!
Well, when you’re already nuts, I guess the only thing left to do is laugh about it, right? lol
Oh my goodness. You had quite the time there. I suppose if it was me, I would have done what ever it took to go get that ice cream. LOL glad to hear you are all safe. hope the hot water comes on soon and you can take a great shower
That’s how I usually feel about ice cream, but, unfortunately, I’m also lazy. : ) I took a hot shower last night. sigh I feel SO spoiled. : )
Jessie, thanks for the belly laugh today and for showing me my life isn’t the only crazy one.
Ha! I’m so glad we could share some laughter! And it’s always nice to know that crazy is normal for other people as well! : )
Haha! Those farm vehicles get us everywhere even if they are junk piles. One of ours had no doors or windows, too. What adventures!
SO true! I was thinking about all the things that didn’t work and while I was riding I decided it would be so much easier to list the things that did – the motor and the tranny and the tires all held air. That’s about it. lol
Oh, my goodness. I’m laughing…and glad that you’re not the one shopping when we meet next summer 😛
Haha! Oh, goodness, that’s such a good point! (Although I saw the menu and it looks awesome! I am really looking forward to it!)
You crack me up, Jessie! Oh, thanks for the laugh and smiles today. Looks like I need to plan a writing retreat in a cow pasture. I could stand to lose weight, although I’m not sure I’d survive without the ice cream!
Ha! Even without ice cream I wrote a lot of words. I can only imagine how much more prolific my retreat might have been if I’d have had ice cream. : )
Seriously …. I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry! I hope your newborn cow that you had in your living room made it. I was praying for you all.
Laugh! For sure. : )
Unfortunately the calf didn’t make it. : ( Thank you for your prayers. Farming takes a good bit of grit, humor, a lot of prayers and a stiff upper lip at times, too.
So sorry.
Love your Post Thank you for sharing!
I’m so glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for stopping in.
Hi, thank you for sharing your lovely post, I enjoyed reading it. Sounds like you had alot of fun ! Have a great weekend and stay safe.
Thanks for reading! I always have fun! : ) Have a wonderful Friday!
Thanks for an enjoyable post. Smiles are good any time. It brought back memories.
Either your husband is a good handyman, just busy, or you need to hire someone to put everything in order. Luckily my husband is a good jack of all trades and keeps things in good shape. My dad on the other hand, was another story. The tree forts we kids built were better than anything he ever did. I think every car we ever had should not have been driven long before he took it off the road. One car we had had push buttons to put it in gear. First we lost first gear. No big deal, you can still get it moving. Next we lost reverse. Again, no problem, just park where you can pull forward to get out. Then we lost second gear, and he still managed to pop the clutch and go. ?When third gear went he finally gave up. The next car had loose brakes, so if you wanted to stop, you had better start braking way ahead of time. When I tried to take my driver’s license test, the parking brake handle came off in my hand. Automatic failure.
Oh wow! Sounds like your dad kept things in your family exciting!
Wow, Jessie, there is roughing it and then THERE IS ROUGHING IT! You are a much bigger person that I am. I would not have climbed into the truck. I am so glad you are safe and sound. I hope you can warm up soon as well as get some hot water. God bless you.
Haha! Oh, you would have. When you saw the handsome fellow who wanted to escort you around, you’d have climbed right in and had a great time, just like I did. : ) And – yes! I did take a nice, hot shower yesterday evening. Bliss. Have a blessed day!