The Facts of Love!

It goes without saying that love has been around since the beginning of time, so it’s not surprising that experts have nailed down some similarities between lovers.  Here’s a few fun ones as compiled by Laura Schaefer, a writer for

**1. Men who kiss their wives in the morning live five years longer than those who don’t.

**2. When it comes to doing the deed early in the relationship, 78 percent of women would decline having sex if they had not shaved their legs or underarms.

**3.  Feminist women are more likely than other females to be in a romantic relationship.

(Now, this one surprised me.  Aren’t the feminists known for declaring they don’t need a man in their lives?)

**4.  When describing how they fell in love, lovers overwhelmingly believe the process is out of their control.

**5.  Couples’ personalities merge over time to make partners more and more similar.

**6. People are more likely to tilt their heads to the right when kissing instead of the left (a whopping 65 percent go to the right!).

**7. According to mathematical theory, we should date a dozen people before choosing a long-term partner to provide the best chance that you’ll make a love match.

**8. A man’s beard grows fastest when he anticipates sex.

(How could they possibly determine that?)

**9. The single biggest predictor of love is proximity. Familiarity breeds comfort and closeness–and romance.

(Well, duh.  Those of us who write romances have always known that.  Throw the hero and heroine together from the get-go, and there’s a guaranteed happy ending.)

**10.  Rosy cheeks are crucial when looking for a lover.  British scientists have discovered that primates prefer mates with red faces.  A rosy glow in humans indicates good health.

(Hmm.  Maybe that’s why we women use blusher, eh?)

A recent study on more than 10,000 dating individuals done at the University of Pennsylvania revealed that it doesn’t take us much time to know when the right person appeals to us.  In fact, it’s almost instantaneous.

Within moments of meeting, men and women rely on visual cues such as age, height and attractiveness to determine their mates.  Oddly enough, deeper rooted factors such as religion, education and income tend to play far smaller roles.

Hmm.  Interesting.

I remember the exact moment when I met my husband.  It’s a vivid memory.  I was a junior in high school and working at a Shopko type of store as a cashier.  He came in with his best friend, who was my best friend’s boyfriend.  Doug stood over by the magazine rack with an Old Home Chocolate pie in his hand.  He had no idea I was even there, but I knew who he was.  He came through my check stand with his friend and barely glanced at me.  But I schmoozed my girlfriend to set us up on a double-date.

I even remember where we went.  And when.  March 10th, 1972.  We went bowling. 

Soon after, our best friends broke up, but Doug and I stayed together.  Even though I saw him first and initiated the first date, he fell for me faster.  I dated a few guys after we met, but Doug never dated another girl since meeting me. 

I absolutely love girl-meets-boy stories.  Tell me yours.  How did you meet your mate?  Was it love at first sight?  Or did it take you longer to decide?

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Pam has written 30 romances, most of them historical westerns, but her newest releases are contemporary sweet romances featuring the Blackstone Ranch series published by Tule Publishing. Stay up on the latest at

50 thoughts on “The Facts of Love!”

  1. The one about the beard made me laugh!!! LOL

    I met my husband at work, I still remember his first day. But it wasn’t love at first sight. LOL We had a mutual friend so we started hanging out together after work every day going to breakfast. (we worked 3rd shift) After a while our friend couldn’t go with us any more because he had classes. My hubby and I kept going every morning and we would talk for hours. We became best friends.

    I wanted to date him but I was terrifed of what it might do to our friendship if it didn’t work out. But I finally got the courage to ask him out. And the rest as they say is history! 😉

    When I told my mom we were going on a date, she said “Well, it’s about time!” LOL In fact that was a lot of peoples response. I guess we were the last ones to know we were meant for each other. LOL

    May 30th is our 7 year wedding anniversary. 🙂

  2. Awww . . . I’m going to love checking back to read these posts today!

    DH and I met at the county fair. He had a bunch of curly blond hair and a muscle car and a sweet grin. We walked around and did all the normal small town fair things and when he walked me to the car, before he opened the door for me, he kissed me. I swear to goodness, I saw fireworks. I was seventeen then.

    We dated until he finished college and had his first job and then we married, and it will be twenty years this October.

  3. Wendell and I met through my best friend and his 1st cousin (they where dating). They tricked us into meeting. We each thought we where going to a wrestling match with the friend or cousin. We found out before the wrestling and he just had to met me first so we went on a double date with friend and cousin. We went to see “Fatal Attraction” I couldn’t have told you anything about that movie at the time. We talked all the way through it (bet the surrounding people wanted to kill us). It was like we had known each other our whole life. It was like that country song “I Knew I Loved You Before I Met You”. We went bowling after the movie and he asked me out again. The rest is history. We Go married a month later. We have know been married going on 21 years.

    Oh, did I tell you he was my first date. I was 21.

  4. LOVED the blog Pam! very interesting’s my story!

    I was a freshman in HS, he was a sophomore. I felt like crap one day at school and looked it to (I remember I was wearing red sweat pants..ugh)!

    I didnt feel like waiting in a long line for I scanned the line to see if I knew anyone that I could break in front of..haha

    I found a guy I knew casually from the previous year at school and asked him….he said yes! So, I got in front of him and noticed this really scraggly looking guy with him Id never seen before (didnt pay him much attention..) I sort of had a crush on the guy I knew..

    Well a few days later..I walked by their table in the cafeteria and they both say hello and wave me over. I walk over and the “sragggly” guy asked me for my phone number!! (he neglected to ask my name so I was a smart*** and didnt give it..only my number..haha) He later called and asked for that long brown haired girl that lives there!! LOL ..anyway..he asked me out finally and I turned him down cause I had a boyfriend! Well, that made him mad at me so..everytime we’s see each other he’d make rude comments…

    He started going out with a girl I knew that was in the marching band with me…and well, something happened while they were dating, he started looking better..LOL, he cut his hair and started dressing neater

    Well, a few months went by and one night out of th blue, he called me and said “she broke up with me, can we talk?”…I said yes! We started talking to each other and he asked me once again to go out! One night he called me to get my answer and I was on the other line with my current boyfriend…I decided YES Id go out with him and broke up with other poor guy on call waiting!! LOL..I clicked back over and said YES!!!!

    So,since I was pretty young, he had to come over to our house first to see me and meet everyone…he brought a friend with him so it was pretty casual. He stayed a while and we just talked and to to know each other a bit. When he left that night, I walked him out to his car and we kissed. As he pulled out of the drive way..I said to myself “I am going to marry him some day”

    We dated all through high school..had our ups and downs and the summer of 1995, the summer he graduated and the summer before my senior year on June 20th, we got married! My grandparents had to sign for me (they raised me)…his parents were pretty upset about it..but that’s a whole other story

    He went on to our tech college for his 2 year degree..I graduated HS towards the top of my class and then attended tech too…..we’ll be married 13 years next month with a 7yr old and a 2 yr old! We are happier now than ever!

    and that’s how we met and fell in love!

  5. Just wanted to say what a fun post today, and love reading everyone’s stories! Too fun! And congrats, everyone! Love’s the best!

  6. Funny!

    My husband and I met through I had posted an ad, but I was at a point in my life that I didn’t think anything would really come of it. I had just come out of a relationship that I thought would last forever, so I wasn’t really looking, but thought I’d post one anyway since it was free.

    He was one of the very first ones to contact me, on April 27th, 2001, and he was the only one I was interested in writing back to because he seemed genuine and sincere. He told me he was a single father with joint custody, buying his home from his dad and that he was tired of the bars and club scenes because no one acts like who they really are at places like that and that he’d had some bad experiences with women who loved him for his money and not himself…he’d met no one he would want to bring into his son’s life, who was just over 2 at the time.

    We started writing back and forth as often as we could and we chatted via messenger, but he kept asking if he could call me or if I could call him. I was living with my parents again (had lived out on my own for a couple of years) but I knew how my dad felt about me giving our phone number away, so I didn’t give him the number at first. We exchanged photos and I told him I though the sort of looked like Tim McGraw. He wrote back and said “more like Tim Conway” LOL He had a funny sense of humor.

    By June, I finally gave in and gave him my pager number and home number. Much to my surprise, I got up the next day to a message on my pager from him. His voice made my insides melt and the two older women I worked with at the grocery store just had to listen, too. They told me I caught a sexy one.

    By this point we had talked about a lot of things and we would send beatgreet cards to each other that played a snippit of music with a love note. (I don’t think that e-card site is even still around)…

    But the first night he called me, we talked for over 2 hours about all sorts of stuff and when we got ready to get off the phone, he told me he loved me for the first time. We hadn’t even met yet, but I was starting to think I loved him already, too, so I said it back to him and I kept thinking of that song “I knew I Loved You Before I Met You.”

    He worked a 4 day on/4 day off 12 hour schedule, but for 4 nights straight when he was off work, he called me and we’d talk for over 2 hours every night. I thought I loved him, but I still wasn’t sure. It could’ve been infatuation or a fluke that we thought so much of each other, though we hadn’t even met, because he lived so far away from me.

    He asked if he could come meet me sometime soon. It was closing in on July, so I asked off for a week’s vacation from my job the week after the 4th so he could come meet me and I planned to go visit for a week with him and his son.

    I sent him snail mail cards and poems I’d written about him almost everyday before he came up and I spent a lot of time imagining how the first meeting would be. Would I not like him when I finally met him? Would I still feel the same about him? Would I run into his arms and kiss him for the first time?

    And so, I paced the front porch at my parents that morning, waiting, impatient, nervous and excited. When he pulled in the driveway and got out, I ran down the stepping stones and flung myself into his arms and kissed him. It still felt the same, but even more exciting because I was in his arms and looking in his eyes and I knew I really did love him. So I spent a week down here and then went back home.

    We continued to talk on the phone and over the computer and a week or so later, he asked me what I’d think if he got a U-haul and moved me down here to be with him because he couldn’t imagine living without me here with him much longer. That he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me.

    I fretted over having a job here, but he told me I didn’t have to work if I didn’t want to, that he made decent money and if I’d like to be a SAHM to his stepson, and the children we’d have together that was perfectly all right with him.

    So, Labor Day weekend 2001, my dad and cousin and I went to pick up the U-haul he had reserved and my parents and a couple other friends and family helped me pack my things into it, while he and his cousin drove up. His cousin drove his truck back and he drove the U-haul down here.

    It’s been almost 7 years since I moved here and we’ll be celebrating our 6th wedding anniversary on June 7th. We have a beautiful daughter and though the road hasn’t always been easy we’re doing pretty good. We have had our issues, but all in all, we’re hanging in there. ;o)

  7. How interesting!

    My husband and I worked together, so that’s where we met. At the time we both had significant others, but we became friends. Over time, we became closer friends and when we were both single, we started dating. Ten months later, he asked me to marry him! The funny thing is, my husband’s motto before we started dating was “Never get your honey where you make your money”. I’m glad he changed his mind … and so is he. 😉

  8. What delightful stories. As a lady who’s still looking for a happy ending, I don’t have a one to share. Maybe I ought to try Taryn’s route.

  9. How fun to log in and see how many of you beat me to P & P this morning!

    Missy, thank you for being the first to visit with us. Funny how love is blind, eh? That everyone knew you were in love before you did.

    Great story! And Happy Anniversary, a few weeks early!

  10. My husband and I met when we worked together. The first time I met him I knew there was something special about him, but we were both married to other people. What started out as a working relationship turned quickly to friendship. As each of us were experiencing trouble in our respective marriages, we found comfort in sharing those issues – y’know, someone to talk to who understood.

    As fate would have it, my marriage ended (it had BEEN on the verge of divorce for years!). Much to my surprise, because he was really working hard to save it, his ended about a year later.

    We started out s-l-o-w-ly, seeing each other mainly with the children together – we each had a boy & a girl that were close in age so that made it nice too as we could do lots of things together with the kids.

    A year later we moved in together and three years after that, we married.

    We’ve been married 15 (16 in June) years and every day is more precious than the day before.

    There is a song by Wynona Judd where she says, “Love is alive at our breakfast table and grows every day and night even in our sleep.”

    That song describes the love between hubby and me to a T.

    Pam T

  11. Well all these stories make me have goose bumps. I love reading them all.
    Elizabeth I hope you find that special person some day I am sure he is out there.

    I was eleven I first seen my hunny he was mowing and I was moving into a new place I was like whistling at him trying to get him to notice me and he didn’t I was very mad, and then my friend said he is mowing the deaf peoples house so maybe he can’t hear you and I said oh yeah so I started walking in front of him and his friends and I think his friend was really mad that I kept going around them well then one day he came up to talk to me and then it just kept happening he would come talk everyday and when we weren’t outside hanging out we were on the phone. It was probably a year haning out and going places and we were walking to my grandma’s and he finally said hey do you want to go out I said I was wondering how long it was going to take you to ask me.

    That was 30 years ago and we will be married 25 years in March. It is just like yesterday (but typing it in here it is like wow look how long it has been) we are still like best friends we answer each others questions. The kids sometimes were upset because we would say the same thing at the same time. The kids are now 22 and 21 where did all the time go?
    I hope that everyone out there finds there love and can enjoy the good times with someone special. I know it is not always easy but it is worth all the times that are not the best.

  12. Love that list!

    I’m a love at first sight story (as are my parents and aunt and uncle who fell in love in the 5th grade and are still married at age 80).

    I met my hubby the first day of college in the elevator on the way up to our floor in the dorms. We lived on the same floor. I just knew that it was meant to be (as did he, apparently). We became best friends, and did that “should we, or shouldn’t we? I really want to be with you dance” that teenagers do for 2 months until we just gave in, and 23 years later are still happily married.

  13. I will have to contemplate #5. My hubby and I have mellowed tremendously over the years – but without fail we disagree over every project we take on. He still does’t get that my way is better. LOL

  14. Melissa!!!!!! You clicked over to call waiting, dumped the guy and went back and said yes???

    Except for the sheer cold-blooded cruelty…that is hilarious. LOL

  15. My husband and I were highschool sweethearts.
    We were friends for about two years before our first date. Sort of ran in the same crowd, hung out on Saturday nights in groups.
    We started dating in such a classic way…
    He mentioned he liked me…I heard about it.
    I said no I didn’t want to date him because I knew it wouldn’t work out and then there’d go not just my friendship with him but with the whole group.
    Finally a friend of MINE phoned and said, “If Ivan asks you out will you say yes.”
    I wavered but agreed.
    Then he phoned.
    We went on a double date to a drive in movie with my friend who had set the whole thing up and her boyfriend.

    He drove me home and we ‘parked’ on the way but he didn’t kiss me. We were seriously young.
    Then we went home and went inside and my mom had made cinnamon rolls and we had one. I walked him back to his car and he finally worked up the nerve to kiss me good-night. Then he said, “That was a little sticky. Let’s try it again.”
    Which he now says just proves he was very suave. LOL

    We dated for almost four years, through the rest of high school and college and got married one month after I graduated. Looking back, I kinda wish we hadn’t waited that month. Wasted time.

    We’ll be married 32 years next January. And he’s STILL tricking me into kissing him more than maybe I should. 😀

  16. AND I am now stuck with a mental image of a woman holding a ruler to a guy’s whiskers and judging if he’s …. interested …. by how fast the beard grows.

  17. Gillian, 17 and seeing fireworks. For you, love WAS instantaneous. Congrats on that 20 year milestone!

    You’re a great example of true love.

  18. Sherry!! A one month courtship before you got married? Wow! And your parents were okay with that?

    Your FIRST date, to boot!

    LOL. You made the right decision. Congrats to you, too!

  19. Melissa, thanks for your story. Took some courage to move down with him, but it was the right kind of courage. 🙂

    I hope to get over to Coffee Time soon. I haven’t forgotten y’all!

    Hello, Fedora! Nice to see you, as always! You’re right–where would we be without love in our lives? It IS the best!

  20. Mary….Wasnt I mean?? LOL oh well, the guy I broke up with never payed attention to me when a football game was, he got what he deserved!! LOL

  21. Taryn! Hi, there!, eh? What a coincidence that they gave us our Love Facts today!

    Marriage is never easy. It’s hard work. Hard, hard, hard. But the vows are what keep us together when the going gets rough. As long as the love is there, it’ll get stronger for the hard times in the end.

    Thanks for telling us your story!

  22. Andrea, I’m glad your husband threw his motto out the window. You had a short courtship, too. Love is working its magic for you both!

    Elizabeth, I know you’re happily single, but I, too, believe there’s someone for everyone. In addition to Taryn’s, I know *alot* of people who have found their honeys on

    Great to hear from you!

  23. Pam, what a lovely ending to your story! You both needed time to heal, but your children really helped bring you all together. I’m touched.

    Brenda, another fine testament to love and marriage! You were ELEVEN when you first became attracted to your hubby? Wow. Incredible!!!

  24. Lori, doesn’t fate work in the strangest ways? Meeting in an elevator isn’t romantic at all, and yet the romance between you bloomed and thrived. Great to hear from you!

    Cheryl, we’re both control freaks, and yep, our way is best. Jay and Doug have had to learn that if ‘mama ain’t happy, ain’t no one happy.’ They might as well give in, eh? LOL!

  25. What a great post, Pam!! Interesting servey 😉

    I met my hubby in the middle of my Sophemore year. I had just moved to my dad’s, a tiny rural cow town–me in the middle of my “punk” phase with partially shaved head and crazy make-up ::oh, the memories…:: It was my first day in the new school and I was being shown around campus. This totally hot guy walked by and I said, “OMG, I have got to have his children!”–A strange teen expression, but you know what they say, careful what you wish for *ggg*. To my sheer astonishment, he started persuing me and I found out he’d spotted me during a dad-visit at a 4th of July car durby the year before–he even remembred everything I was wearing. Our first date was Me & Ed’s Pizza, where he made me laugh while taking a drink and ended up with Pepsi all over him *G* We’ve come a long way from cruising through town on his bike and me on his handle bars 😀

  26. Oh, I knew these stories would be great! What an excellent idea for a blog topic. I’ve really loved reading all your stories, ladies! 🙂

  27. My hubby and I met in high school but did not date. The main reason: he was Captain of the football team and Boyfriend of the Head Cheeleader/Homecoming Queen. As for me, well, I was a Dork. But the Christmas after college, we met again at a holiday party and it was an across the room magic moment. They do happen.

    He’s a true hero to want to hang around with me
    — after I picked the harrowing Burt Reynold’s movie “Deliverance” for our first date!

    But we’ve been together ever since 🙂

    The kiss to the right is right LOL. Even though I’m left-handed and usually do things backward from everybody else.

    Such a fun post. Thank you!

  28. AS for being a dork Tanya, I always tell my girls to go for the nerds.

    You can put sharp clothes on anyone and toss out their pocket-protectors. Nerds have good brains and terrific earning potential, not to mention the GRATEFUL factor.

  29. Tanya, you are so not a dork! And funny about the right-side kiss, even tho you tend to do all other things left-side. But did you notice the image I picked? They’re angled to the left.

    Leave it to me, eh?

  30. Pam, my husband and I fell in love at first sight. I knew right away that he “the one” and he said he felt that way too. I worked as a waitress in a steak restaurant. He came in and sat in my section and left me big tip. I gave him extra special attention. I think the third time he came in he finally asked me for a date. And the rest was history. I’m a big believer in love at first sight.

    Great subject, Pam! Some of your statistics made me laugh. Hope you have a good day.

  31. Too funny about your left-side kissing photo. I did not notice…but then I do things backward to begin with.

    And yes, Mary, there is much to be said about nerds. Dorks of the world, unite! 🙂

  32. LOL, Pam! Oh yeah, had to test society, to see if anyone could see beyond the white face paint and wild hair, to the goodness on the INSIDE 🙂 Funny thing about the first time my hubby was struck by me (I never saw him that day), the outfit he remembered so vividely from the year before was purple capris and a rainbow striped shirt (gag!)–he loved my rainbow side and my dark side 😉 He was a keeper! *g* We’ll be married 20 years this year, and our baby just turned 13 yesterday. My how time flies!

  33. Hey Pam,
    It’s funny how much we have in common. I met my hubby while in Junior High. He was one year older and his locker was by mine. I thought he was soooo cute and loved it when we both ended up there at the same time. We never spoke, but I knew he was one of four brothers who lived around the corner from me. He graduated and went on the high school and I was so pleasantly surprised one day when I’d gotten to high school that he’d come up to me and invited me to a Halloween costume party. That was Oct 24th 1971. We celebrate that date every year — it’s been 37 and so far, so good. He was my Locker Crush!

  34. I absolutely couldn’t stand my husband when we first met. I thought he was an arrogant know it all.
    Thirteen years later he became my arrogant know it all.

  35. Linda, I thought of you when I wrote this post. I know you’re missing your hubby while you write about the first time you met. Sure wish he was here to reminsce with you. But it sounds like your love bloomed right away, and what a gift that was!

  36. Charlene, you always speak so lovingly of your hubby. Anyone can tell you have had a love-filled marriage.

    I didn’t know you’ve been married for 37 years. Doug and I will be at 33 years next month!

  37. Well, Estella, it seems love wasn’t instantaneous for you. You’ve defied the odds, and yet fate meant for you two to be together. Thirteen (years) was your lucky number, eh? Here’s to many more–arrogance and all. 🙂

  38. I have been sleeping with my husband all my life.
    We were in the nursery together when we were born.
    He is one week older than me. We didn’t meet again until I was out of high school and working in the big city of Omaha. I was home for the weekend and the small town thing to do was cruise the streets of the little towns around the area. (gas was really cheap then). I think I fell in love with his car, a red 60 Impala. We have been married 43 yrs.

    Another interesting fact. Mary C’s parents introduced my parents at a dance in a now defunct town called Bertha in Nebraska. Mary’s late father-in-law was my Dad’s cousin.

  39. Honey and I met at a graduation party: danced, mixed
    and mingled, had a great time, and on the way home
    he told the guy he was with that he was going to
    marry me! We dated for two years, then he asked me to marry him and after some while I accepted. I was hesitant because I am older and I’m Hispanic. It
    is not such a big deal today, but then in the ’60s
    in Texas, it was a societal no-no! Some of his
    family and some of my friends tried to talk us out
    of our decision. We are happy we didn’t listen to
    them. We celebrated our 47th anniversary in April!

  40. Sue, the opening line of your comment *really* got my attention. LOL.

    Yowza–if you two weren’t meant to be together, I don’t know what is. Sharing the same nursery. Incredible! I love it . . .

    And so interesting to know how you and Mary know each other.

  41. Hi ladies. The stories are great. My parents loved my husband from the first. On the night he proposed to me he asked my Daddy for my hand.

  42. I married my high school sweetheart and he was my first real boyfriend. He was the new kid who was born in Paris (air force brat) and I had never left my home town. In retrospect we married too young (18 and 20) but it’s been 38 years next month so I guess something is right lol. My oldest daughter is getting married in July and it’s her 4th boyfriend but they seem like a very good match and she’s 24 and he’s 25. Time will tell 🙂

  43. Hi, Jeanne,

    18 and 20 seem really young today, but back then, it was the norm. In my hometown, it was *very* common to marry within 2 years after graduation. There, not so many went onto college. Union Pacific was (and still is) a major employer and it’s lucrative enough to support a family. Which is exactly what my husband did.

    I married when I was 20 and had my first baby 15 mos. later. Now, that seems frighteningly young for today’s generation.

  44. Sue, I know who you are. The Bertha reference gave you away. LOL

    Sleeping with him all your life, huh?
    Well, Ivan and I come close born in the same hospital, but I was an aging four month old when he came along.

  45. Bertha is a little ghost town near me. I think I’ve talked about it in earlier posts. Lot of lost little towns around, there’s more left of Bertha than of many of them.

    And I think 18 and 20 was a lot older 30+ years ago than it is now.

  46. I don’t know that marrying at 18 was the norm when I married — A LOT of people flatout asked if I was pregnant or when the baby was due. Uhm…no baby 🙂 Not for five years anyhow. One interesting thing is that three of my hubby’s brothers (8, 9 and 10 years older than us) also married their high school sweethearts at age 18. A family tradition 😀

    Now at 37, with 13 and 14 year-old sons, 18 seems TERRIBLY YOUNG. To think I started dating their dad at 15 years old…just a year older than my FREAKS ME OUT 😉

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