I’m excited for Aiming for His Heart to be released on June 30th. Writing this book, the tenth story in our Pink Pistol Sisterhood series, challenged me in many ways. First, at 40,000 words, it’s the shortest story I’ve written. I hear those who know me well laughing because you know I can’t say hello in less than fifty words. 🙂 In my first writing classes, the instructor asked if I was taking her class on writing tighter. To my I hadn’t decided answer, she responded that I needed to. Despite hard work on that, I struggled 60,000 word Harlequin novels within the overage allowance.
I also had less time to write this story. When I start a book, I count on two things happening. I’ll start in the wrong place, either too far into the story or too far . I’ll take wrong turns. Sure enough. Both happened with Aiming for His Heart. In fact, the wrong turns were so disastrous I pretty much started over once. Maybe twice. While I was proud of writing in the shorter time frame, as a tortoise writing (unlike many of my amazing rabbit speed writing filly sisters), doing so took its toll.
However, the main challenge came from my heroine, Jade. Boy did she and I get into a battle of wills. Okay. I hear you laughing again. Yes, I know I can be stubborn, too. ? Our trouble started during brainstorming. My story ideas almost always start with the hero. In fact, only one hasn’t. But in the Pink Pistol Sisterhood series the heroine receives the pink-handled pistol which plays a key part in the story. This meant the story needed to begin with Jade. Until I learned her backstory, her personality, and what she wanted, I couldn’t move forward. And blast the woman, she wouldn’t let me into her head.
I knew Jade’s mother died when Jade was ten. From then until she went attended college, Jade spent summers and school vacations with her maternal aunt in Oklahoma. There Jade found the love and acceptance she often didn’t receive from her workaholic, distant father and his new family. Jade revealed her past to me, but after that, she shut down. All she revealed was she was returning to Oklahoma to settle her aunt’s estate.
Anyone who’s taken on that task knows how emotionally and physically exhausting it is. Despite putting Jade in stressful situations, she remained distant, almost emotionless. Thankfully, while talking to my dear friend and critique partner, Nancy Haddock, I realized Jade acted that way because she didn’t want to feel anything. She didn’t want to let anyone in. I finally had my key to her character. Jade feared if she felt anything, especially grief, she’d fall apart and never recover. She viewed her emotions as the enemy because when she lost control of them, chaos and disaster followed.
Being a sinister author, I had to break her. But as often happens in my stories, in busting through my character’s defenses and forcing them to face their issues, I make a discovery of my own. I learned I had been at war with my emotions lately. Because I had been feeling too much for lack of better words, I didn’t want to feel anything and had shut down in some ways, too. Forcing Jade to deal with her emotions forced me to grow and deal with mine, too. I guess, not only do I write what I know, sometimes I write about what I need to learn.
GIVEAWAY: To be entered in my random drawing for cactus tote leave a comment about a challenge that made you grow and what you learned or what new skill you acquired.
Julie Benson has written five novels for Harlequin American, and her Wishing, Texas series is available from Tule Publishing. Now that her three sons have left the nest in Dallas, when she isn't writing, Julie spends her time working on home improvement projects, rescuing dogs, and visiting Texas wineries with her husband. Visit her at www.juliebenson.net.
After submitting four different writing projects to multiple places and being rejected on all, I had to take a step back and figure what I wasn’t getting right. I contemplated quitting writing.
But I decided I wasn’t done trying, so I wrote another story and became published again.
Denise, I can’t tell you how many times I took a break from writing and considered quitting. (That includes after publishing!) I started seriously writing when my oldest was a year or two old. Guess when I sold? When he was in college! The same instructor that told me I needed to write tighter, in front of the entire class btw, said the authors who make it aren’t always the most talented. The ones who make it are the most persistent.
Think about what you’re writing. I wrote historical romance and romantic suspense first, but couldn’t sell them. I was stuck on a story and tried what a friend always did in those situations, I turned to a different story. I started the one contemporary western romance idea I had. When a multi-published friend read the first chapter, she said, “I now know you’ve been writing the wrong thing all these years.” That story became my first sale, BIg City Cowboy.
Hang in there!
Thank you, Julie!
I always wanted to learn to dance (ballet), & finally got the chance as a 40- something year old when our family moved to my husbands new teaching job at our community college. I was leary of taking ballet with kids half my age who had had prior dance experience, but I wasn’t getting any younger, so I jumped right in. I loved the challenge & artistry of dancing, but I never enjoyed performing for an audience. It has almost been the most physically demanding challenge I’ve ever faced (the hardest was having & raising my children), & I’m working on my black belt in TaeKwanDo now (ballet was much harder)! I finally gave it up after more than 10 years when my arthritis & other age related problems became too much. I still do TaeKwanDo, but it’s just not the same.
Ami, first of all, you’re right, the biggest challenge is raising children! It’s also the most rewarding. Nothing else I will ever do (providing I don’t find the answer to world peace) is having raised three kind, responsible, and amazing men.
I admire your courage to learn ballet at 40! How terrific. Athletes say they work out hard, but ballerinas put them to shame. Also good for you for sticking with it because it gave you pleasure, even though you didn’t enjoy performing. I laughed when you say Tae Kwan Do is easier. Good luck on getting that black belt. I have no doubt you’ll reach that goal.
Thanks for being here today. Take care, stay safe, and have a great spring.
I just want to say how much I enjoyed reading this blog…. It brought a smile to my face and another TBR to my list!
Thank you, Jeannette! It’s funny, when I started the story, I didn’t think Jade was anything like me. The more I wrote the more similarities, I discovered. I’m doing the last read through now, and I’m shocked how much of me came through her. The only other time I’ve done something like this was when I wrote Roping the Rancher. I was going through issues with my mother at the time. A lot of what I experienced and felt came through in that book. It was incredibly cathartic. This book helped me make realizations about myself and make changes I needed to.
Thank you for being here. Take care, stay safe, and have a fabulous rest of the week.
After being laid off in 1984 at the telephone company as an operator(yep, an old fashion operator using cords to connect person to the number they wanted), it was getting out to find a job. Being young, that wasn’t hard and I was determined. Fast forward to June 1991, I knew I had to quit my job at Barnett Bank. The working conditions wasn’t the best. At the age of 31, my doctor said I either needed to make a change at work or leave, I was going to hurt my health. Quit my job??
Finally after praying one night, the answer came. Give my worries to Him. I could do this. My father died of a heart attack 3 months later. I took time to help my mother, my grandmother, and my handicapped brother. If I had been working, I never would have been able to give my time to my family. In August 1993, I started my 29 year career in education so I could be with my small children. I never regretted “letting go” of my stressful job back then. My lesson was be quiet, pray, and listen. The answer will come!
I’m enjoying the Pink Pistol series! This book sounds like it will be a too!
Tracy, being laid off is the worst. It’s happened to my husband twice. I tell people it was harder on our family than when I had breast cancer. And how awful that your job at the bank was so stressful your doctor warned what it could do to your health. Something’s very wrong with a place that has that kind of work environment. I’m continually amazed how God puts blessings into what is often one of our lowest times. It’s also amazing how hard it is for us to let go and turn things over to Him. I think writing this book reminded me how important it is to do that. I’d been carrying the burden myself which never goes well.
Thank you for being here today. Your faith and ability to turn things over to God is truly inspiring.
I know this isn’t the kind of answer you are expecting. My greatest challenge was when my husband passed away. We had been married 42 years. I had to learn to live by myself, which I had never done. I lived with my parents until I married my first husband. When we divorced, I had my two daughters. Then I married my husband. We had bought a house two months before he passed. I was so afraid to be by myself at night. I did so much praying, I’m sure God was tired of listening to me. I know that God is not a God of fear, so I prayed for Him to please take my fear away. I have been living by myself for five and a half years now.
The death of my childhood friend really hit me and after I had tovadjust to life without her. It took a while to fund someone else I could be at ease with.
David, losing anyone close is hard, but losing someone who gets you the way a best friend does is devastating.
Challenges come in many forms. Mine was simple compared to what you tackled. Women my age, and I suspect we’re of a similar generation, didn’t live alone. I did exactly what you did. I moved from my parents house to college, where I had a roommate. The next year I moved into my sorority house, and had a houseful of people living there. Then I married my husband and moved to Texas. What courage it had to take for you to face that. I’m going to remember you the next time I find myself scared. Remembering your courage will remind me to pray for God to release me from my fear.
Thank you for being here today and for sharing your story. Take care, stay safe, and have a blessed week.
When my husband passed away we had been married 35 years and it was hard at first to stay by myself we had 5 adult children and they had families of their own I prayed for the Lord to help me to get through this to not be afraid of being by myself and going places by myself ! He helped me through this and I Thank him so much everyday! Have a Blessed Day!
Sarah, l what courage you had to live by yourself. I think of my grandmother who was widowed for the second time when I was a toddler. She lived alone for over 15 years. She was blessed to have a dear friend who lived in the same town, and they would travel.
Thank you for being here and sharing your story. Have a blessed week.
I am still dealing with grief over losing my Mom in March of 2015, best friend and coworker in June 2015, grandmother in August 2015, MIL Feb of 2016, and Dad in Feb 2017.
Teresa, the amount of loss you’ve experienced in such a short time is unbelievable. The fact that you are still here and such a positive, caring person testifies to your strength. May God bring you blessings this year and fill your heart. Thank you for being here.
Losing my husband at 56 was a shock and a big adjustment. I moved, traveled and made friends. Life goes on and I have adapted.
Ruth, it’s never easy to make basically a new life, no matter what the reason. However, losing a husband so young had to hit you doubly hard. You are an incredible woman with a huge amount of strength.
Thank you for being here today. Take care, stay safe, and have a lovely spring.
All my life I was healthy and strong and then suddenly I was faced with medical challenges and had to confront serious issues alone. I knew that I had the strength to combat and survive these life threatening difficulties. I faced them alone and managed well. Now I am able to face anything.
Heath problems are never easy. When our body is hurting, it’s hard to stay positive. When my mother had health problems, instead of thanking God he put her in contact with doctors who possessed the ability to help her, she railed at Him because she was sick. That attitude only made her situation worse. How wonderful that you went in with the attitude that your health problems would not defeat you. I’m sure that helped in your recovery.
Thank you for being here and for sharing your story.
When I moved away from the city I grew up and lived in for nearly 45 yrs, and moved to a much smaller city and no family or friends, it was a big adjustment not having anyone to turn to if their was an emergency. A couple of time I just had to get myself to the doctor or hospital.
Kathleen, I moved a long way from family, too. Like you, when I had to deal with things on my own, I learned how much strength I possessed. Thank you for being here. Take care, stay safe, and have a blessed week.
When I was in my early 20’s and married with 2 children, my mother was brutally murdered as well as 2 others. I can still relive this happening and feel much sorrow for her loss. It took me several years to feel like I could live again when she could no longer do so. Not having my faith solidly in God/Jesus at the time didn’t help. Yes, I did attend church but I had grown up in church, attending with my parents, every Sunday. But somewhere I did not pick up on what made this special in my life. I now know my mother is in a much better place and I have plans to see her again someday. Losing a parent in a brutal way is a very difficult thing to take and try to adjust to. Thankfully I wasn’t alone.
Judy, I admire you for surviving such an unimaginable tragedy. It would’ve been so easy to give up or turn to hating the world. I’m sure your Mom is beaming with pride seeing what you’ve done with your life.
Thank you for being here today, and may God bless you.
My challenge was learning to cook from my Mother. Needless, to say; it was a BIGGER challenge for her.
Since that time I married & now can cooking fairly well. No complaints from husband, family & friends.
Hope, you have a blessed Mother’s Day.
Lois, thank you for being here today. Cooking can be a challenge. I wish I’d spent more time with my grandmother learning to cook. My mother and aunts never did, and so many of my grandmother’s skills and recipes were lost. I’m so glad you took the time to learn from your mother.
Take care and have a wonderful spring.
My mother was a contradiction at times. Her life made me realize no one stays the same and change can be used to one’s benefit. I think her being her allowed me to live life to the fullest. I began a whole new career at 65 and stay married to my high-school sweetheart to this day. It will be 62 years this summer…and it went by so quickly I can’t imagine. I miss her daily.
Susan, it takes an incredible amount of courage, faith, and self-confidence to start a new career at any age, but at 65 it’s even more amazing. It’s also not easy staying married for 62 years. You should write a book about how you accomplished both of those feats! I’m sure others could benefit from your knowledge.
Thank you for being here today. Take care, and have a wonderful rest of the week.
Julie, this is very interesting. I think all of us writers struggle with whatever we sign up to write–whether long or short. Writing is just hard. I’m so happy you persevered. I know your story will be great.
Talk about persevering! You’re the expert. I am in awe of you. My challenges with this story were insignificant compared to what you overcame while you wrote your book for the Pink Pistol Sisterhood. And you’re right. Writing is hard. What I don’t understand is why it doesn’t get easier the way a lot of other careers do.
Fabulous cover. I learned to have accept change and endurance after I took the second quad tendon off my knee cap. I had taken the right one off in a work related accident. The left one ripped when I tried to get into a tow truck. I had to learn to be still and allow others to help and take care of me. I was in a straight leg brace for 15 months. I was never able to back to work. Thank you so much for sharing. God bless you.
Debbie, goodness. Talk about having knee trouble. 15 months is a long time. What a blessing that you had family and friends willing to take care of you. Not everyone has people in their lives who would help for that length of time.
I’m always amazed how a simple action such as trying to get into a tow truck can do so much damage. A friend horribly broke her ankle simply stepping off a curb. She’s had multiple surgeries and still has difficulties with her ankle.
Thank you for being here today. Take care, stay away from tow trucks, and have a blessed week.
Back there in the days when computers started being common things in a home, being in my 50’s, I decided I needed to start learning how to use one. I took some classes at the local community college and learned the basics, but with a lot of practice, and some mistakes, and with the handicap of having to start out with “dial up” internet, I reached my goal of knowing mostly what I was doing.
Connie, good for you! So many folks, my mom included, refused to learn new things, especially those associated with new technology. She came right out and said she didn’t want to learn. The last 20 years of her life that made things difficult as old technology such as typewriters disappeared and she couldn’t use the computer. I always said I hope I never get like that, where I say I’m done learning new skills and personal growth. It’s a sad way to live.
Thank you for being here today. Take care, stay safe, and have a fabulous week.
My greatest challenge came when my Mom passed away in December of 2020. I had never lived by myself before. From the time I started working, I’d always worked in offices, but I’d never moved out of my parents’ house. So, I was able to help my Mom with my Daddy before he passed away. Then, I knew if I moved out, I’d be at Mom’s way more than I’d be at my own place, so I stayed. When I was laid off, Mom told me that it was time for me to be home with her, so I was home full-time as Mom’s full-time caregiver the last 9 years of her life. After being home with her for a year, I became a licensed insurance agent, as I could work from home, and work around taking her to her doctor’s appointments, and doing all of the household chores. When she passed, it was a challenge to learn to be by myself.
I’ve heard others who’ve taken care of their parents say something similar. Being the main caregiver intertwined their lives so much that when the parents passed, they had to completely rebuild their lives. Sadly, it’s good and bad. Good in that you were able to spend so much time with your mother, and no one would care for her with love the way you did. But, it’s hard because then you were left with an even bigger hole in your heart and life when she died.
Thank you for being here today and for sharing your story. Take care and have a wonderful rest of the week.
learned how to garden and grow veggies
I loved planting a garden when my boys were younger. We’d plant one every spring break. The only thing that grew well were the green beans. I’m envious if your garden does well. I’d especially love to grow tomatoes.
Thank you for stopping by today. Have a great rest of the week.
I had to learn to protect my emotions early on. As the oldest of 6, I was expected to not make any mistakes, be an example, and take on responsibilities when my siblings were not. I learned to shut down my emotions and deal. As I got older and knew what I wanted to do, it turned into a battle of wills. None of my plans and dreams were supported. I guess that is where my stubborn streak came from. There was no support for my studies in HS or college. My dad did what he could to make me quit and not succeed. However, he was happy to brag about my graduating with honors. I learned if I want something, I needed to do everything I can to achieve it on my own. I also learned to be a good planner and hard worker.