Airflight, Tuna and My Christmas Gift to You

cartoon_airplaneI want to talk a little bit about air travel. Completely wrong for a western romance sight, I know, but I want to share a bit of my wisdom with you after years of air travel. Not a LOT of years, but definitely more than one. Plural. Years.

I’m not very good at air travel. I’m getting better, but my first plane flight was around five years ago. Yes, that’s right, I was the last one on the planet to finally go up.

But here’s the thing, I don’t really believe in air travel.

I mean, sure, the planes take off and land all the time, I get that, it exists. I’m accepting of that because I have eyes and have seen it, but it doesn’t really make sense.

I mean just LOOK at that plane. It’s iron. It can’t go up there? It certainly can’t STAY up there. It makes no sense.

Before I wrote this, I went and read a little bit about acceleration and thrust and wind currents and wing flaps and yes, sure there’s science behind it, but to me, it just seems far fetched.

So, I spend my air flights gripping the arm rests and doing my best to help LIFT the plane into the air. I also spend a lot of time in prayer. I mean seriously, if airplanes can’t really exist as I suspect, then all air travel boils down to a miracle. So if I LIFT and PRAY, then I feel like I’ve done all I can do. I’ve done my part.

So air travel is a miracle. God knows we really need to get around faster so He just gave us this. So I spend time in prayer for the miracle to continue (after all, when the Red Sea parted, it didn’t stay apart FOREVER now did it?) And I also spend some time making sure my soul is right with the Lord. . .should He become fed up with the human race. . .it’s bound to happen soon. . .I mean did you ever WATCH HBO after 10 p.m?

So if he gets tired of putting up with us. . .I suppose air travel will be one of the first things to go.

I might add here that it’s not just air travel that is a miracle. Do you ever eat tuna2-smcanned tuna? Have you really THOUGHT about canned tuna. Does it make ANY SENSE to you that tuna keeps in a can for years? I mean I know about sterilization and vacuum packing, I GET IT.

But still, it seems really outlandish to me that, just because it’s inside a sealed tin can, it would keep. Try letting it sit in on a cupboard shelf for a while with the can open and just see what happens.

So, God gave us that too, probably because He knew we needed fish in our diet and we couldn’t ALL live beside the ocean or a lake or river.



The Husband Tree
The Husband Tree

I’ve got a book coming in January called The Husband Tree and there is no air travel, nor canned fish eating in my book. Sure, there’s a cattle drive across the Rocky Mountains with a woman, her four daughter, including a breast feeding infant, and one hapless man, but no air travel for goodness sake.


I like my books to be a little more realistic than that.


The point of this is, (are you surprised to find out I have a point?) in the spirit of the holiday season, as my gift to you, the loyal readers of Petticoats & Pistols, I want to share with you this one thought before you begin your holiday travels.



If you ever hear of all the planes suddenly plunging out of the sky, and ……………

…………….you’re not on one of them at the time……….. (if you are on one of them, just forget this whole blog)…………….

…………don’t plan………..

…………any time soon…………………………….

…………..on eating any tuna sandwiches.

 You’re Welcome            



             MERRY CHRISTMAS


             MERRY CHRISTMAS




Website | + posts

Author of Romantic Comedy...with Cowboys including the bestselling Kincaid Brides Series

15 thoughts on “Airflight, Tuna and My Christmas Gift to You”

  1. Smiling from ear to ear, Mary. I used to love flying, the whole idea of being up in the air, looking down on clouds while nice people bring you food and drink was delightful. No longer. Now being crammed into that metal tube, often after hours of on-ground stress, is plain torture.
    As for canned tuna…my cats would refuse to live in a world without canned tuna and Fancy Feast.
    The book sounds wonderful. LOVE your title!

  2. Hahaha… Yes, there is something just ‘not quite right’ about sitting in a tin can, flying through the air at break neck speed… Freaks me out too. I’ve never understood how there can be ‘bumps’ in the air either. I mean, turbulence? What the heck is that?!?!? How in the world can there be a ‘bump’ in the sky?
    I eat my tuna from a pouch. 🙂

    Can’t wait to read the new book!

  3. Hi, Mary. I’m with you about the whole heavier than air flying thing. I feel the same way about ships. At least in previous centuries they were made of wood. Wood floats. But these giant, armor-plated military vessels and ginormous cruise ships? How in the world do they stay atop the water? For someone who is more afraid of drowning than falling from the sky, I’ll stick to the planes and let other poor suckers take the boats.

  4. Hi Mary, With family on the West Coast and us on the East Coast, plus a son who went to school in Egypt and now works overseas, *and* a husband who used to travel monthly for business, my family has racked up more air miles than I can count. It’s well over 300,000, but we always fly cheap so it’s not on the same airline. No frequent flyers miles to cash in. Rats!

    I don’t mind flying as long as there’s no turbulence. On the LAX-Dulles flights, I’d get 5 uninterrupted hours to read and read and read. I loved that!

    If it’s a rough flight, forget it! I’ve only been really scared once and that was enough!

  5. Karen, I know what you mean about boats. I mean LOOK AT AN AIRCRAFT CARRIER SOMETIME. IT’S IRON. Now go lay a fork on top of your sink full of dishwater. Guess what? It doesn’t float.
    Very mysterious.

  6. I never flew before the madness of airport security but I saw a few people off on planes. We’d walk down there with them. Sit and visit until boarding time. I’d stay and watch the plane taxi back and take off.

    Forget that now.

  7. I am not much on flying myself. I have only been on a plain twice in my life. Once on a little small plain for a plain ride and the other time on a large plain. The whole time I was wondering what I would do if this plain went down.

  8. Mary, how hilarious! You always make me laugh. So do your books. I figure God put you on this planet to lift other’s spirits. And you do a mighty fine job of it. Thank you very much!

  9. Hi Mary, as always, you’ve got me laughing. I actually love to fly which, considering my terror of down-escalators, is a weird thing. Although getting frisked and searched at the mini-airport in Kona Hawaii had me having such a tantrum they warned me to settle down or they couldn’t let me fly that day. It started when they picked four respectable middle-aged people (incl. me) to get searched…while letting thug-looking twenty-year olds board scot-free. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

    Well, as you see, I made it home LOL. Merry Christmas everybody!

  10. Your blogs and your books are true joy to read!
    Thanks so much for sharing today’s wonderful thoughts!

    Pat Cochran

  11. Thanks for the smiles. My husband flew in the Air Force for 24 years. First in B-52’s and then in FB-111’s. If you have ever seen a B-52 take off, you’d be amazed it ever gets off the ground. I chose to have faith that it would all work out well. It was either that or worry myself sick every time he flew. I remember flying cross country on a 747 shortly after they were added to the commercial fleet. I had a window seat and you could see the wings “flapping” (not really, but they were flexing). Didn’t give me a great feeling of security. Both planes shouldn’t be able to get off the ground and stay in the air. They remind me of bumble bees. They shouldn’t be able to fly either, but they can. I guess faith is what we have to hang on to. I don’t mind flying, but am a bit on edge while doing so.

    I like the sound of your January book. Will have to treat myself to it for my birthday. Determined women can accomplish just about anything men can.

    Have a great Holiday Season! I’ll have a tuna sandwich in your honor.

  12. I don’t know how I missed this wonderful post. I’m certainly not one for air travel — must admit that I drive most everywhere. Sorry I missed this, Mary.

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