I am one of those people who are annoyed when movies don’t make any kind of sense and break all the rules to put the stars in peril. A good example of this is when the cop goes charging into a dangerous situation without calling for back up. I mutter at the TV screen, “Call for back-up. Call for Back-up, Call for back-up.” Then groan and roll my eyes when they don’t.
But not Walker Texas Ranger.
Hey, One Ranger ~ One Riot.
Walker’s not gonna call for back-up. Back-up is for WIMPS. Anyway, why waste the gas for back-up to drive over when he’ll clear things out on his own, no problem.
I found Chuck Norris jokes. These are only a few of….estimating … rounding down … ONE ZILLION.
Who knew? I picked a few favorites. I really love jokes, and comic strips because to me, a well done twist of words is a writing skill and I really love seeing what a joke writer can do in so few words.
1. If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
5. When Chuck Norris jumps in a pool he doesn’t get wet water gets Chuck Norris.
6. What is the quickest way to mans heart?
Chuck Norris’s fist.
7. The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
8. The opening scene of the movie “Saving Private Ryan” is loosely based on games of dodgeball Chuck Norris played in second grade.
9 . In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Chuck Norris could use to kill you.
10. Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands.
14. The picture on the left? Chuck Norris Toilet Paper.
18. The best part of waking up is not Folgers in your cup, but knowing that Chuck Norris didn’t kill you in your sleep.
19. Bill Gates lives in constant fear that Chuck Norris’ PC will crash.
25. Pinatas were made in an attempt to get Chuck Norris to stop kicking the people of Mexico. Sadly this backfired, as all it has resulted in is Chuck Norris now looking for candy after he kicks his victims.
26. When an episode of Walker Texas Ranger was aired in France, the French surrendered to Chuck Norris just to be on the safe side.
27. Chuck Norris once ate a whole cake before his friends could tell him there was a stripper in it.
28. There is no such thing as tornados. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
And here’s one that’s serious. This isn’t a joke. This is ‘Chuck’s Code of Ethics. Chuck Norris had created an organization that helps at-risk teens find themselves, self-control and ethics through martial arts training. He has donated to it as well as raised millions of dollars to it. So don’t forget, while a silly but fun culture of jokes about Chuck’s insane toughest run wild, there’s a serious and thoughtful side to the man, too.
Have you ever heard of these? Google Chuck Norris Jokes (If you’re not afraid) and the supply is endless. I Googled Chuck Norris Images and there are about a zillion Chuck Norris picture jokes, too. If they were REALLY scared of Chuck Norris, I suppose there won’t be any. Tell me a Chuck Norris joke…if you dare!
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