When it rains it pours

 width=Good Morning!

I hope you will forgive my short post today.  I am sitting here at home (which is good), but with some grief in my heart, and a little pain, as well.  My brother-in-law passed away four days ago and because we were close this has affected me very much.  And then as if that isn’t enough, when I was out walking our dogs (which are wild dogs that we made our own last July when we were on the Blackfeet reservation), I fell and was dragged a bit and ended up with a broken hand and so I am hunting and pecking in order to type this.  Add to that that my darling kitty ate a plant yeterday that appears to be poisonous and you might understand my concern.

Well I was hoping to post a picture of my brother-in-law, but I can’t seem to make my computer work either.   Anyway as a memorial, let me say a few words.  When I married my husband 12 years ago, I didn’t know at the time that when I did, he came complete with my brother-in-law.  They were so close that it was almost like having two husbands instead of one.  I became used to over time having two men to boss around instead of one –I’m sure you can relate — and I must admit that I used the relationship shamelessly.  If my husband didn’t respond to “honey, could you fix this?”  My brother-in-law would and if he didn’t all it would take on my part would be to ask my brother-in-law to do something, and my husband would at once respond.  : )  Finally I was able to figure out how to download his picture — here is Bob about 10 years ago.

I will miss him.  I will miss how good I’ve had it also over these past few years.  And I hope you will forgive this terribly short post — I literally am hunting and pecking to talk to you today.  Have a super day, everyone.

From left to right my husband, Paul, me, my daughter, Trina and Bob.  Picture was taken in 1999.

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KAREN KAY aka GEN BAILEY is the multi-published author of American Indian Historical Romances. She has written for such prestigious publishers as AVON/HarperCollins, Berkley/Penguin/Putnam and Samhain Publishing. KAREN KAY’S great grandmother was Choctaw Indian and Kay is honored to be able to write about the American Indian Culture.
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61 thoughts on “When it rains it pours”

  1. Karen, you dear thing. Please accept my condolences on your brother-in-law’s passing. I know you were so desperate to come home after being away so long, but to return under these circumstances must be quite disappointing.

    And to break your hand–yeesh! At least the book is turned in. Every day will get better. And I hope the kitty is doing well.

    Hugs, my friend.

  2. Karen,
    I was over at Coffeetime Romance and saw the invite to come over. I’m very sorry to hear of your loss. I don’t have a brother-in-law and never had the chance for such a special relationship. I guess bad things are supposed to come in three’s so hopefully you’re done. Hope your cat is okay.
    Take Care,

  3. Oh Karen…so sorry to hear of your loss and I hope that things start getting better. Loss of a loved one is never easy. Thank goodness for family and friends and shoulders to cry on.


  4. Karen, what a tough time. I’m so sorry about your brother-in-law and your hand and your kitten.

    Talking about your brother-in-law stepping in when you couldn’t get your husband to help out made me think of my own mother-in-law. For YEARS we have tag teamed my husband to get things done.

    He’s great, don’t get me wrong, but he’s a little slow to pitch in on some things. Plus we live in his grandparent’s house and there are times when the house takes on an almost sacred place in his head, which when we first moved here translated to, “The kitchen was good enough for my grandparents and it’s good enough for us.”

    And such things. 🙂

    So, I’d go tell his MOM what I wanted in the kitchen (the wall gone, new cupboards, new flooring, whatever….) and she’d say to my husband, “You know, I always thought that kitchen was just to small to function in…your grandma did too.”

    And then husband would come home and say, “I think we ought to tear the wall out…….”

    If his MOM (who in fairness to my husband is a very conservative, very practical woman…not into fancy really) thought something would be a good idea, then HE thought so too.

    She always played ball really well with me. 🙂
    I love his mother.

  5. Hugs and blessings, Karen. I can imagine what a tough time you’re going through. Hope your kitty will be ok. As for the rest, your hand will heal and so will you, in time. Celebrate the loving relationship you had with your brother-in-law. You were lucky to have known him, and so was he.
    Now take some time to be good to yourself. You deserve and need it.

  6. I am so sorry for your loss. How is your husband handling the death of his brother? My thoughts and prayers are with you. I hope that this week will bring some physical and emotional healing for you.

  7. I am so sorry to hear about your brother in law Karen. My thoughts are with you and your husband.

  8. Kay- Love and prayers going your way to comfort you and your family in your time of grief. Sorry to hear of your loss.
    I hope your hand heals quickly and you’re feeling better soon.

    Keeping good thoughts for your kitty too.

    Sending positive thoughts your way!

    Much love,

  9. Kay, I’m so sorry about your brother-in-law. Even though it was probably best that he leave this earth it really hurts and I’m sure you’re going to miss him each day that you wake up.

    Life is really beating you up right now with the broken hand and worry over the kitty. Just try to take each moment as it comes and remember to keep breathing!

    Love and prayers.

  10. Thank you, Pam. Yes,at least the book is turned in — there is a proposal due, but my agent is contacting my editor about that. At least I can hunt and peck. I can;t write as it is my writing hand that is broken — the bone leading up to the pinky.

    Again thanks.

  11. Thanks Kathy for coming over and for your well wishes. Yes, my relationship with my BIL was close — and I hope you are right about those 3’s. 🙂

  12. Thanks Maureen. I’m just back from the vet — and my little Georgie will be there all day for observation. He had quite a fever. Don’t know what I’ll do with the plant — might throw it out — we’ll see. Thanks for your weel wishes,

  13. Taryn, so nice to see you again. I feel like I’ve been dropped in the middle of a soap opera, I must admit. You should see my face… Cause I fell hard on my face, as well. So much is happening in my personal life that I;ve forgotten about all my warm internet friends and so it;s nice to see you here, : )

  14. Ah, Mary, you understand what it;s like to gain the support of someone else, I must admit that I have done that shamelessly — and openly admit to bossing both of the men, So glad ti see that you have a terrific MIL. 🙂

  15. Thank you Cheryl. I must admit that I am worried about my DH because he and my BIL are so very, very close. I do believe that our church will help. Thank goodness for family, friends, and those of the church. 🙂

  16. Hi Linda!

    Yeah, as I said, I feel a bit like a walking soap opera, not a good feeling actually. But the kitty is with the vet and I think he will be okay (knock on wood). Thanks, Linda.

  17. I too am so sorry for your loss,bless your heart,you have had your share of troubles lately,you an your family are in my prayers,Vickie

  18. Oh my goodness Karen you have been having a terrible time. I do believe that things come in three’s and I had my share of three’s last year. I will pray for you and you hubby you will need all the prayers to get you through this hard time, just try and remember there are so many people out there that care about you. I hope you have a quick heal on the hand, and your pour kitty I hope he is okay. I will send you some special prayers out there to you.

  19. Hi Brenda!

    Thanks so much. Yes, prayers are so needed. I;m sorry that you had your share last year. Goodness! Thanks fir all you thoughts. 🙂

  20. Awh Karen, my prayers are going out to you and your family. I’m glad to see that you’re talking about your BIL. So many people want to take their grief and hide with the mindset that no else understands their pain, but of course your hubby does. Keep talking to him about his brother so that the good memories will comfort you both.

    So, you can’t write, eh? What about a digital voice recorder (dvr)? I always have one with me b/c ideas come to me in grocery lines and driving down the hwy, etc. On my cheap little dvr, I can talk for 35 hrs! And the more expensive models can transcribe right onto your computer.

  21. Karen, Try real hard to feel this…I just sent you a big hug. I am so sorry to hear about your brother-in-law, I’m sure i told you awhile back about my sister-in-law (2 of them) and my brother. Alot of times in laws become real brother and sisters, the love is the same and so is the pain. I know this is a real hard time for you but do know there’s so many that love you and will pray for you and your family. As for you kitty we had the same experience don’t try and get her to eat unless she wants to but plenty of water to flush it out. My cat did eat poisionous plants he layed around for a few days, he tired easily but is fine now except a little ditsey. Gosh girl I can’t believe you broke your hand please take care and know we are all thinking of you. You’re precious!sending another hugg

  22. Hi Anita Mae!

    /Thank you so much for all your thoughts, now, does the thing actually type? Do you just plug it in –and where do you get such a thing? Wow!

  23. Karen i just saw the pictures you posted that is so sweet. You have a beautiful daughter as well please tell your husband we’re sorry for the loss of his brother also.

  24. Hi Lori!

    It’s great to see you here. Thank you for all you said. My DH and I were forcing some activated charcoal down his throat before I took him to the vet. Thanks for your kind, kind words. Much love coming back at you.

  25. I’m so sorry. Maybe since they say things happen in 3’s you will have only good things happen now 🙂

  26. Hey Karen, I bought my digital voice recorder at Staples and then found one at Walmart for half the price with twice the time…that’s 70 hrs of talking! And newer models have prob’ly come out since last Sept when I bought it.

    Mine only comes with a USB cord. When I plug it into my laptop, I hear whatever I recorded and then type it.

    BUT there are others that you can plug into your ‘puter and yes, they actually will type the words. I first saw this technology 10 yrs ago but it was too slow for me in those pre-dvr days.

    Last fall, I noticed that one of the expensive ones had obviously been returned but I don’t know if it was b/c expectations weren’t met or not. Now I don’t know if tech’gy How fas has technology adanced? It might be worth a try in your case.
    At the very least, with a cheap one, you’d be able to use your time plotting, etc if not for the actual writing. (At least I can’t ‘write’ with one of those, but it’s amazing how a character sketch can develop when I’m driving down the road.)

    The reason I thought of it is b/c sometimes people do their best writing when their spirit is filled with emotion. It can be a cathartic experience and it can help in the grieving process, as well.

  27. Karen,

    Please accept my condolences on the loss of your
    brother-in-law! Can you feel the hugs and hear
    the good thoughts sent to you and your husband?
    We will keep your family in prayer.

    Pat Cochran

  28. Hi Karen: Your family has our condolences and you and your husband are in my prayers. It doesn’t always get easier but I believe that a little part of everyone lives on in those of us that loved and shared lives together and the soul is always alive.

    I hope your hand starts feeling better and you can use a digital voice recorder. My husband uses it to dictate patient notes and a transcriptionist types them. It shouldn’t be that expensive for what you want to do and it’s temporary.

    Take care and good thoughts are headed your way.

  29. Kay, I am late visiting the junction today as we just got back from a trip, had the dogs to pick up at the ranch-kennel, unpacking etc. Know that my prayers and love are with you as your mourn this lovely brother and friend…

    What a beautiful family you have. That always makes thing better.

    Love and hugs…

  30. {{{HUGS}}} and {{{PRAYERS}}} for strength and comfort for you and your husband, Kay. I’m so sorry to hear about your hand and face on top of it all. You’ve been through too much! Also praying that you’ll heal very quickly.

  31. Oh, Karen, I’m so sorry. It is great that Paul was so close to his brother throughout his life. (((HUGS))) & prayers to you and your family.

    Wishing you rest and healing. I hope your kitty is feeling better too.

  32. Hugs, Kay–I’m so sorry for all that’s happened! May you receive comfort and healing inside and out. Take care!

  33. Dear Anita mae,

    Thanks so much for telling me about this. I will go and check it out as soon as I can, I don’t shop at WalMart but I certainly do at Staples and Office Depot. Thanks for the time and effort you put into this as well. I so appreciate it, Love, Kay

  34. Hi Za,

    I believe like you that the part of you who is you is immortal and never dies, I do believe that in another place and time he will be the source of joy to others. Thanks for keeping us in your prayers.

  35. So sorry to hear of the loss of your brother-in-law. I especially feel for you being in pain as I know how hard that is. I hope you get better soon.

  36. well..if this reply is actually posted this time…Just wanted you to know that I tried 2 times yesterday and it would not post! 🙁

    I am so sorry to hear of your loss Karen. I know it’s so hard to lose someone you love, especially when they were such a big part of your life.


  37. Melissa, I had wondered where you were I guess you got locked out of the house! LOL just kidding it happened to me several times too, you don’t think they’re trying to tell us something do ya? LOL

  38. So sorry for your loss, Karen. I understand completely. My BIL (husband’s brother) died in June 2005 of CHF; in Aug. my husband was diagnosed with the same heart disease just weeks before the two hurricanes ripped the coast of LA! Then, in 2006 his/their sister died of cancer.

    As you said, when it rains, it pours and, as Brenda said, things come in three’s…it poured on us for 3 yrs running (2004 was rough too, but we won’t get into that) 🙂

    Like the others, a dvr might be a good investment.

    Take care of yourself.
    Hugs and Prayers!

  39. Thanks Pam — so soory that it rained on you for 3 years. Not fun, but then 2008 so far has been a bad year for several others, or so my agent has told me, May this all turn around and may the rest of the year be filled with warmth and good things,

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