I just completed writing my 75th novel. It’s a Christmas story set to come out next Christmas. It’s always more enjoyable to write a holiday book during the holiday season.
For fun, I started each chapter with a quote about Christmas. The last chapter includes this quote: “The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value.”—Charles Dudley Warner. In the final scene of the book, the hero gives the heroine an inexpensive gift that means more to her than all the gold in the world because the gift shows that he knows her inside and out.
Writing the book reminded me of the deeper meaning of gift giving. It’s not just an exchange of objects to delight and please our loved ones. The perfect gift is one that communicates the message: I love you. I know you. You are important to me.
In the course of writing the book, here’s what I discovered about choosing the perfect gift.
1) Decide what it is you want to say.
For example, what if you wanted to tell your loved one that you really appreciated what they did for you during a bad time in your life? Chose a gift that will show that appreciation. Let’s say they gave you a ride home after your car broke down. You could give them a gift card to a gas station.
2) Then ask yourself what can you give them that will communicate this message?
In other words, what specific item(s) could you purchase or make that symbolizes the message you want to communicate? Maybe you want to support a loved ones dream of being a musician. Guitar lessons might be the perfect choice.
3) Give from your heart, not your pocketbook.
It’s too easy to get caught up in spending when you’re bombarded with media advertising, but when you gift from the heart the price of the gift truly doesn’t matter. One of the favorite things my husband ever gave me was a straw hat he decorated himself with fishing lures that reminded me of a fly-fishing adventure we had in Yellowstone.
4) Take your time.
Take your time picking out the perfect gift. A perfect gift isn’t rushed. It takes thought and planning. A friend of mine, whose mother was going blind, recorded all her favorite recipes on audio, so Mom could listen to the instructions while she cooked.
5) Consider history.
When searching for the perfect gift consider your history with the person you’re giving the gift to or their personal history. A gift that reminds the receiver of a happy time and place stirs positive emotions in the moment.
One year, my mother-in-law squealed with delight one year when I got her Circus Peanuts because she’d once told me her father had given them to her every Christmas.
The benefits of taking the time and effort to chose a gift that perfectly fits that person, and what you want to say to them, is that ultimately you feel good about making them feel good.
And maybe that is the best gift of all.
What’s the best gift you’ve either given or received?.
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The very best gift ever was from my husband one Valentines Day. He recreated the gift he had given my our first Valentines Day forty five years later. He baked spritz cookies for me. I loved the thought that went into this gift!
One of the best Christmas gifts I ever received was my hope chest. I had wanted one for years and my mom surprised me one year by leaving it behind the tree with presents on it and it was covered up. I was amazed. That was over 40 years ago and I still have it and it is still very special to me.
I love the cover of your book Lori. It’s magical.
Smiles & Blessings,
Cindy W.
countrybear52 AT yahoo DOT com
Great gift ideas. Prior to last night, I would have said my best gift would have been the Hawaii trip my ex bought for me (after we divorced) for my 40th birthday. Late last night, me and my husband had to rush one of our cats to the emergency vet. A good friend that I met through Facebook but ever met in person, insisted on getting the number for the clinic and she called in and paid for most of the vet bill. This is the best gift and most unexpected gift that I have ever gotten. I cried because no one has ever done anything like this for me.
One of the most memorable Christmas gifts I received was from my then boyfriend at the time. He’d given me an electric blanket to keep me warm when we weren’t together. (I still lived at home). I eventually married him and we’ve been together over 30 years.
Congrats on 75 books!
The best gift I have ever given was a photo book to my grown sons. I went through all of our old photo albums and scanned pictures of family vacations. I put the old pictures in a Shutterfly photo book for each of them. It was fun for me to create it and look at how the boys had changed over the years and all the places we have traveled. I liked it so much that I ordered one for me. So, this was the best gift I ever gave AND received.
My best/favorite is the Christmas quilt my mother made all her “girls” our last Christmas together.. your quote –
“The excellence of a gift lies in its appropriateness rather than in its value.” – how true ! !
dkstevensne AT outlook DOt COm
Hi Lori! Welcome back to P&P. It’s been way too long. We’re thrilled to have you. And such a timely subject. I really need work in the gift-giving part, no matter if it’s Christmas or not. I never know what to get anyone. I try to think of something that fits that person’s lifestyle and personality but often miss the mark. It’s really hard sometimes and I tend to beat myself up when I fail.
One of my best gifts was a fleece scarf that a friend brought back from Ireland. It’s so soft and warm. But the fact that she took time during her travels to pick up something so special really touched my heart.
Congratulations on the new release! I love that cover. So pretty and Christmassy.
Hi, Lori! Thank you for sharing this wonderful post! I don’t think I can name just one favorite gift. I love the handmade gifts my children give me, the family treasures that have been passed down, and the little, unexpected gifts that mean so much. I have many favorites! Merry Christmas!
Wow, congrats on book 75! One of the best gifts I ever received was a candle making kit from my sister years ago… she knows how creative I am and that I love candles… so it was a wonderful idea… Happy Holidays! 🙂
my dog’s company (he gave me his dog when he couldn’t care for him)
One of my best gifts to get was a cat when I was 11. My parents really didn’t want any pets but I had begged for years. I was really surprised. Happy Holidays.
In our previous life of a pastors family, we had absolutely everything we ever wanted or needed. In our new life (10 yrs now) as a missionary’s wife…. we have almost nothing. Well…nothing, in the world’s eyes. The other day a friend’s daughter took me to the movie, as a gift. I now appreciate the little things so much more!
The best gift I have ever received was the realization of God’s love given to me through His Son Jesus. Can’t beat that one. On a “natural” note, my husband regularly sends me “air flowers.” (Much cheaper than real ones and they never fade! 😉 ) Thanks for the opportunity to receive your book. Merry Christmas!
We’ll pick out cards at the store, exchange them, read them…hug and put them back. He also picks out flowers and says…honey, if we could afford them, this is what I’d give you! And then we put them back!
Wow, Lori….75 books…..Congratulations! Thank you for your beautiful post!
The gifts I gave straight from my heart were letters to each of my three grandchildren. I love them dearly!
I enjoy your heartfelt stories so much. When I pick up one of your books, I know I will be meeting “people” I can care about and will be treated to an enjoyable story.
I guess the gift I enjoyed giving the most, was the one I gave my husband the first year we were married. He was shipped back to Guam for the Vietnam war 5 weeks after we got married. We both enjoyed the out of doors and had hiked and canoed. On our last trip before he left, we went to the Old Town canoe outlet store. He really liked them, but he was leaving in a few days and it didn’t make sense to get one and store it for a year. After he left, I saw an add for a new one not far from where we lived. I bought it and put it in our base house living room. That October he called and told me to book a flight and be in Guam for Thanksgiving. I wrapped the can of rubbing compound for the canoe and brought it with me on the plane (couldn’t do that today). He was extended so couldn’t come home to his mother’s with me for Christmas as we had originally planned. The night I left, I gave him the compound. He just stared at it not able to figure out the what and why of it. When I explained, he was thrilled. We enjoyed that canoe for over 35 years, until our son wrapped it around a rock. We have many fond memories attached to the adventures we and our 3 children had in that canoe.
Thank you for a lovely post. It is good to remind ourselves just what is important about gift giving. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas and a great New Year.
Congrats on 75 books! That’s a lot of stories and us readers appreciate them.
One of my favorite Christmas gifts, when I was about five, was a teddy bear my brother bought me for Christmas with his “Gooch points” he got with his 4-H club calf’s cattle feed. I remember sitting in my grandparent’s house when I got it, and my little Georgia cousins were visiting, so the bear was named Brenda after the baby. And of course I still have that little bear.
The best gift I ever received was a 5 speed Schwinn bike when I was in the 4th grade. In fact I still have it 50 years later!
Congrats on 75 books. I have read this book and it was awesome, best Christmas story I have read this year. Best gift I have ever received in my life would have to be my son.
Congratulations, Lori. Choosing just one gift would be difficult, but I’ve been privileged to have numerous heartfelt gifts from my husband and children over the years.
What a fun story about the peanuts as a gift. One of the best gifts I’ve given lately was a bag of Cheetos. The laughter and memories it triggered were great.
Congratulations on the 75 books!
Nancy